Aligning What We Want With Who We Are

Who are you?
Changing something about your life without knowing who you are is like trying to get to a destination without knowing where you are. You can't do it.

We're made up of ideas and beliefs and values that blend together and represent our lives. They tell us how to behave, how to work, how to think; basically how to live.When we have an idea that something's not right and we begin to think about change, we can easily get sidelined (sometimes through desperation) into pursuing change that fits more with someones life other than our own.

How does this happen?
Let's say your weight's started to creep up a little and it's affecting your life, negatively. You decide you want to lose some weight. Great. So what do you do? Maybe you had success on a particular diet before, or you go online and see what's knew and quick in the weight loss arena.

You find one you think you'll like, buy all the specific foods, join a gym so you can do the workouts, and you get started. Fantastic. The first couple of weeks go well, and you've actually dropped a few pounds. This is working!

However, in the third week, you find you're motivation lagging, your enthusiasm for the workouts waning, and you start to crave what you used to eat. You cheat a little on the diet, start skipping some workouts, and begin to get down on yourself. What happened?


Aligning your goals with your values
Usually when we decide to act on something we go in feet first without using our heads. We don't take the time to really examine why it is that we want something, and we fail to look beyond the obvious: 'I need to lose weight, so I'll diet and go to the gym.'

Simple? Not really.

Let's say, instead, that you sit down with yourself and go through the question and answer process that we discussed in the previous post. What did you find out?

You hate the gym; you hate all the fit people prancing around, showing off their bodies; and you despise the thought of showing up there. Secondly, you really miss all the good food you were eating, and when you thought about it, you really do eat healthy food, you just need to cut back a little and remove the junk.

Through your analysis, you discovered that the weight gain was do to stress at work. Food became an elixir when exercise would have been a better choice. Which, by the way, you prefer to do outside, alone, in nature. It brings you peace.

So what values can we take from this exercise? Easy. You value good food and exercise as a way of life; you value health; you value nature; and, you value time for yourself. Now take this information and build a weight loss program, based on YOUR values, lifestyle, and capabilities, and take control.

Motivation pulls us either toward or away from something. The key to successful change is finding out what is truly motivating your desire for change, and building a plan that fits your life--not some imagined life.